Posted 9:35 PM by Ted

well yeah it's monday..and yeah I skipped last week but what's the point..I mean writing these really doesn't get me anywhere. I don't feel better about myself for writing these. I can't wait till I get paid because there is soo much I want to do and having at least some money will make me feel better.  It's weird..the guy who hates the word "goals" and likes to go with the flow is changing. I am n't happy anymore  waiting for something to happen. I need to be the one to make things happen.  The past 9 months have been weird. I am not the same person I was when I graduated. I've talk the talk about change. The time has come where I need to walk the walk. I have learned so much but I know I've only taken the 1st baby steps in a long ass journey. I don't think some of you would accept the viewpoints that I have learned about.  It's ok that you don't accept or understand. It's not about you. I have learned I can't try to change other people I can only change myself. Last week I was mad at about 95% of the people in my life. I realized it's like I was thinking everyone was wrong but me. I also realized that maybe I should look at what I am doing because everyone else can't be wrong..if it was 1 or 2 people I could see that but not everybody. sorry I just keep going on...bottom line is..the last rut I was in should be the last rut. Change starts now and I must accept that. peace out.